Recently, as I coached a leader, we discussed how difficult life had been during the past year but was now on the upswing. I then asked her to reflect on what had made the past year so tough and why the present was different?

The leader is involved currently in something that is very new and exciting, and she is passionate about it. So I asked the question, “How much of a difference is your improved situation tied to your involvement in something that you’re passionate about and is new and exciting?” The leader was quick to point out that although this new and exciting thing did help, it was not as big a reason as one might think.

Without a doubt we live in a fast-paced, crazy-busy world today. The word casual is rarely used to describe life – except for how we dress. Occasionally, my wife will invite me to attend a work-related function with her, and I will ask how I should dress; the reply usually comes back, “casual.”

I often wonder where a phrase like this has gone: “Let’s go for a casual walk.” Now we go for power walks, trying to burn as many calories in as short a time as possible. Or what about having “a casual conversation,” rather than competing with each other to tell as much as we can about ourselves (or

Try as you might, you cannot avoid conflict in relationships. Relational conflict is a natural part of human existence. Therefore, you need to figure out how best to deal with it rather than avoid it.

When conflict exists in a relationship and all you do is seek to avoid it, you only allow it to worsen. The longer conflict is avoided or ignored, the more it festers or escalates.

When working as a manager at a call center, I recall having a conflict with a colleague. Rather than dealing with it immediately, I avoided it because I lacked the tools to manage it. The end result was that I distanced myself from my colleague and our relationship became rather awkward. Since then I’ve learned to deal with conflicts as soon as possible because I value relationships.

Let me suggest three biblical steps that will help you manage your conflicts rather than avoid them.

Sleep is more important than food. Those of you who know me must be wondering if I have lost my mind. But I came to realize you could go a week without food and the most you would lose is weight. Try going 24 hours without sleep and you are unable to function effectively. The research is overwhelming that most of us need seven to eight hours of sleep nightly to feel rested, have more naturally sustained energy and focus better. An incredibly small number among us can survive on seven hours or less sleep.

You delude yourself if you think you can stay awake until all hours of the night, consistently get less than seven or eight hours of sleep, and be fully rested and functional.

Here is the challenge most of us who are sleep deprived have to face: We have no idea how dysfunctional we are until we start getting sufficient sleep and see the difference in our productivity, alertness, focus and energy.